Tuesday, June 17, 2014

How I am teaching my baby to ASK



Recently Bridger was re-evaluated again to see where he landed developmentally.  It was one of those "yay" and "awe" moments.  He is right where he needs to be with his gross motor skills, ask me how I know this.
Playing at the park

He is all over the place so this is nothing new to me.  It is a slow decent from there.  He is at a 10 month level with fine motor.  This is mostly due to his inability (or lack of interest) to pick things up with his fingers.   He is cognitively at an 8 month level.  Thinking back this makes sense.  No wonder he is confused and anxious all the time.  It's like putting a 6 year old into a 25 year old's body (is that too drastic?).  His speech was the lowest being at 6 month level.  The speech and cognitive were discouraging to hear.  I knew he was behind but it's hard to hear your child is almost a YEAR behind.
I wanted more than anything to pout and be upset about it.  That always seems to be the easiest solution right?  Maybe I did pout, for a minute.  Then I started doing my research.  I can never say this enough but:

Knowledge is power

I got this awesome copy of a book called Sign about Meal Time.  I have been incorporating it a lot into our meal time lately.  Especially with the things that he likes the most like:
Sign About Meal Time

I think it will make a difference.  It's frustrating right now because there are no instant results but I think slowly they are starting to stick with him.  I help him make the signs whenever I can.  I would highly recommend this book to anyone.
Speaking of instant results I was getting frustrated.  I happened to come across the idea from my aunt and a few mom's with disabled kids.  They talked about making their kids ASK for what they wanted.  This intrigued me.  They could ask however they wanted but not with crying and whining.  They could ask with words, sign, or just pointing they just HAVE to ask.  I decided that I would try this with Bridger.  I put Bridger in his chair and explained to him that he needed to ask and pointed his hand to each meal item.  This is the results I got:
He screamed, did his fake cry, and simply ignored me but I stuck with it.  I worried that he wouldn't do it when he finally placed his hand next to the water.  I gave him a big drink of water!  We clapped and cheered, I told him thank you in sign, and asked him "more?"  He fought it the whole way but he put his hand to each thing that he wanted.  I gave him lots of hugs, claps, and cheers.  Positive reinforcement is key.  He was frustrated but it was the first time that he really had to tell mommy what he wanted.  I felt like it was a huge success!
Since then I have been making him do this with every meal.  It is hard but he does understand.  Look at how well he is doing now!

He almost looks like he is enjoying it sometimes.  

I know that he can communicate with us.  At this point there is going to be a whole lot of resistance.  Bridger is used to having everything catered to him.  I am definitely a culprit.  Even when your baby isn't sick you cater to their every need.  Add sickness to that and they are like china dolls.  
Bridger's disorder does cause speech problems in most children.  I expect him to be behind.  However he proved that he DOES understand and that he CAN communicate.  So we're going to work even harder.  I expect a pretty grumpy baby for awhile but it is so-SO worth it.               

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